Ameeeeeeeeey ♥

hello everyone .
life's been shitty this past week , but im feeling much much better now .
i think im doing better in my studies and that maybe i'll have a chance to
even fair well for my Os .
and thnks Mdm Lung for prinitng chem notes for us .
that notes realie gave me hope on my Chemistry , i was starting to think that
im not gonna have enough time to study all my Chem and i was starting to panic .
hahas .

& yes , i know youve probably heard whats been happening between me
& dearest Irsyad . yes , we went our separate ways and its okay ,
im respecting ure decisions .
reallie Irsyad , i reallie did understand u and yes i did accept you for who you are .
ive realised that ive not explained enough to you but , it'll probably be pointless now ,
but yeahs Ryann & Farid said , Patience & Perseverance is the key , so i might as well
post it now .
the reason why i dont understand why ure keeping things from me was that ,
i reallie thought that i as ure girlfriend would have a right to know what ure going through ,
be it ure joy , ure sadness or anitink that comes ure way . and yes , i'd still dare to think
that other girls in this wide-wide world will think the same way i did too .
i thought u wasnt convinced when i said that i accept you for who u are and
also that i understand what ure going through .
im so sorry i'd think that way , and all i can do now is live with regrets .
theres so much more that i wanted to do with you , wanted to say to you ,
wanted to feel with you but i never got the chance to cause of my shallow-mindedness .
yes , ive always love you alot , ive always understand u and that ive always trusted you .
the situation got the better of me at most times , but , i know thats no reason .
we didnt communicate well & that may have cause most of the understandings ,
at least to me .
and honey , ive never put you on the same level of importance with someone else .
youve always been the first person i think about in the morning when i wake up ,
and the last person i think of at night when i sleep and reallie , im always thinking about you .
that person , ive long regarded him as a friend , not more than that and i have no feelings for him anymore unlike how other people pointed out to you .
theyre not me so , they dont know how i reallie felt .
and you were the one who taught me to forget the past , forget him and accept everything thats fated . youre presence in my life had so much impact on me , as in a good way .
you taught me loads of stuffs and most of all , thorugh everything youve done for me and in general , youve taught me to love you .
still yes , im respecting ure decision , even though im devastated and hurt .
its okay , i understand why youve come to it .
i understand ive given you so much more hurt than happiness and that you wanna break out from it . but just so you know , i'll always love you and that im always here for you .
and no , i dont think ure evil okay honey ?
and you take very good care of ureself , eat more Roti John , Nips & Yam Pie and drinks loads more Soya Bean so you wont be so thin and that you wont get gastric .
and oh ya !, write more songs ! and study smart for ure Os !!
& i love you and i miss you .

and thanks so much to my friends who tried to cheer me up ,
who talked to me , who was with me when im down .
namely , Saangeetha , Farah , Ryann , Farid , Cass , Aisyah .
and thanks so much Ryann & Elis for the hugs ,
and Sufyan & Patricia for listening .
and Darshenee and all of you guys for the advice .
and Farid , thnks alotttttttttttttt for being you , thnks
alot for ure advice , for ure help and also for being there .
yeahs , i hope things work out :]

other than our breakup , one of my classmate have been reallie-reallie mean to me &
Saangeetha . pls classmate , reflect on ureself .
whatever you do , shows how immature you are .
and i DID NOT do anitink to you , so , pls explain the attitude youve been giving me ,
by blaming me for the breakup and also laughing in my face with ure group of friends , doesnt help when im cryink my heart out & begging Ish to talk to me . ive always respected you
as my classmate and maybe friend . but , explain to me what ive done wrong
to always get laughed at , screamed at and blamed by you ?
me and Saangeetha is close , but does that mean that i also told the teacher on you ?
get ure facts right . and , what you said at ure blog is pure bullshit .
reflect on ureself , ask ureself why she told on you .
you imagine ureself being in her shoes , whereby you studied reallie hard for an exam ,
and ure classmate next to you , with no shame at all , took out her notes and start referring
to the notes through the exam . nevermind that , when the whole class gets back their results ,
you and her are on the same level meaning that u got the same marks as her .
wont you feel its unfair ? wont you get fed-up ?
now tell me .
and pls reflect on ureself before you hurl insults at me and Saangeetha .
what you say about or to ask , doesnt matter but to come to think of it ,
im blogging bout this , to alert you on how immature youve been .
tell me what you gonna say to the teacher if one of us would had wanna complain .
' erms . i insulted , shout and laughed at her cause she told teacher i cheat in my test '
who is the teacher gonna reprimand ? you ? or us ?
ask ureself . im sure Saangeetha didnt want to tell on you but tell me how many times
have you cheated . and pls , my dear girl . Os are just 2 months away , if youre gonna
cheat in tests , how are you gonna know how you reallie fair ? and how are you gonna prepare ?
we're not tryink to get you into trouble , we just want you to realise your mistakes and
reallie start studyink . pls think .
and for the last time , i didnt report you to teacher & i didnt to anitink to you .
so , stop giving me ure sick attitude .

and oh ya !
my dear Farah , i hope things will work out for you and Amsyar .
dont fight anymore okay dearie and things will be okay .
move on with him , not w/o him okay .
and i'll make sure Amsyar treat you right this time .
and i'll go personally to his house and punch his face the next time he hurt you .

my dear cousin Nisa , you cheer up , dont cry anymore .
listen to ure heart , do what you think is best for you .
ive not met Rahu but i know he must be nice for you to fall for him ..
but apart from that , do consider Ayum's feelings , look at how far the both of you
have gone , thinks back about the memories both of you share ,
do you wanna throw it all away just like that ? i cant make the decision for you ..
listen to your heart and do what you think is best for ureself .
dont care bout what people say , you live for ureself and nobody else ; quoting Ryann :]
cheer up okay ? and as promise ,
HAPPY BELATED 16TH BIRTHDAY TO NISAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !
; 13/08/2008 .
& HAPPY NISAYUM DAYYYYYY ! one year already eh ?
hahas .

& HAPPY BELATED 14th TO FAHRUL FAHMI ; 080808 .
lil' bro , study hard for ureself , make ibu & ayah proud :]
dont be naughty anymore okay & dont make me angry with you cause ,
i'll make you angry with me and then we'll fight .
so ya , happy birthday bro :]

and i got my MT Os results .
i got a B3 AND a Merit for my oral . hip-hip-hooray to me .
i dont have to retake :]

that'll be it , need to get ready for night study :]
bbye ; I LOVE YOU .